


The ultimate enemy

by cecewho



Category: V for Vendetta (2005), V for Vendetta (Comic), V for Vendetta - All Media Types
Genre: Cat, Crack, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Humor, Kitten, PWP without Porn, There is a cat, What Was I Thinking?, meant to be funny, v vs cat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-11
Updated: 2016-11-11
Packaged: 2018-08-30 10:27:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8529535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cecewho/pseuds/cecewho
Summary: For once, Justice had to be stopped.
 
 
[ooc//no plot//what is a plot?//please forgive me]





	

That was it. V was done. He could not go on like that, he would not go on like that. It was either him or Justice. That despiteful creature wanted to ruin his life. His only purpose was to destroy everything he loved and V wouldn't have let that happen. For once, Justice had to be stopped.

“Evey!” The girl, who was in the other room busy checking some files from the government, startled by her fiancé’s sudden shout, ran to their shared bedroom with one of V’s many knifes ready to eliminate any form of menace but all that welcomed her behind the door was his lover fumbling over one of his many black blouses.

“What’s going on?” 

“That - thing you brought into my house is a _disaster_!” Exclaimed the man in the most dramatic way possible and looking distraught even with his Guy Fawkes’ mask on.

“You mean Justice?” Asked the woman looking around for the subject of their speech.

“How could you name such an infernal demon after something so holy! Look at this! It’s ruined forever!” And  with that V sat down on the bed holding his head between his hands. Evey slowly walked towards him and saw the scratches and the cat hair which decorated his lover’s shirt. Right in that moment the small ball of red hair which had caused all the fuss decided to jump on the bed looking for attention.

“You little- Evey pass me the sword it’s time to get rid of this creature!” The man had stood up from the bed and was staring at the cat’s green eyes in the most menacing way he could muster but the kitten seemed unfaltering. Evey was watching the entire thing concerned for her fiancé’s mental health, but she decided that for Justice’s safety it was better to put away the knife. 

“V, dear, you do realize that you’re throwing a temper tantrum over a cat, right?” Asked the woman getting closer. He turned suddenly towards her gripping her forearm.

“He is not a cat Evey, that thing is a demon, a creature of Satan, he is conspiring against me. Look at him Evey! He is trying to destroy me piece by piece, by killing everything I love! First the armchair, then the curtains…this is the twelfth shirt he ruins with his God forsaken hair! I fear you could be next Evey and I need to protect you.” V was very serious throughout his speech and Evey was pretty sure that his mental health was completely gone.

“V, listen, could you please think about what you just said for a moment? You think that a kitten-

“Incarnation of Satan”

“- you think that a kitten, is _conspiring_ against you and trying to kill _me_.” V nodded solemnly. 

“Look, love, I know that you’re not very familiar with all the pet thing, but believe me when I say, that every cat behaves like this and Justice is not planning to kill me or you any time soon.” Said Evey calmly, trying to make the man reason.

“But he destroyed my favorite armchair with his hellish claws, he ripped to shreds the curtains of Valerie’s shrine and my shirts, he is always attacking me, and he is always spending time with you! Oh no!” He threw his hands on his mouth when the last words left his lips. Evey stared at him for a moment. 

“You’re…jealous…of a cat…?” She pronounced each word slowly, hardly believing what she was saying herself. He turned away, probably blushing under the piece of steel that covered his face. After a few seconds of silence Evey decided to sit on the bed and waited until V took the place next to her. Nearly immediately Justice crawled on the man’s lap and stated nuzzling against his chin making a loud purring sound. For a second V seemed uncertain but then Evey guided his hand on the cat’s back and the feline mewled happily.

“It’s just that since you’ve brought Justice here you’ve been doing nothing but cuddling him, or watching movies with him on the couch. All we ever talk about is how ‘cute and adorable and fluffy’ Justice is.” V sighed and Evey could have sworn that if he wasn't wearing his mask he would have been pouting.

“Dearest, you shouldn't be jealous…Justice is just a cat after all, and I hope you realize why he can’t replace you. You are the only one I’ll ever want and love and I’m sorry I’ve been neglecting you. I love you and so does Justice so why don’t we just make up and watch the Count of Monte Cristo? I can make pop-corns if you want.” 

That night all three of them were in the living room, with Justice on one of the dark cushions watching his owners react all the scenes from their beloved movie, and in that moment V couldn't care less about the fact that the cat’s hair was everywhere on the couch.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Please forgive me for this thing. I'm sorry, it was a hard week.   
> I dunno...in the remote possibility you've liked this or I made you laugh a little, leave a kudo or a comment...i like those...  
> mind that i don't have a beta reader and that i'm italian so...you know...i'm all about quality.  
> i can't believe I'm posting this for real, oh well!  
> bye guys i hope i made you laugh! ;)
> 
>  
> 
> Cece


End file.
